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Please
No Mo
Let
me tell you a little story about a man named Mo.
Mo
was a classic repeat offender... not only did he show signs
of desperation by writing often, but he wigged out if I didn't
write him back right way. Just goes to show -- always trust
your instincts.
First
e-mail, nothing to write home about, and furthermore, nothing
to write HIM about!
Second
e-mail, just a few days later...
Since
I was still relatively new at the whole internet thing, and
hadn't yet experienced many repeat offenders, I was amused
and sent these to my friends..
Jen:
MEET THE MO. You must MEET THE MO. We need pics of Mo. Aw,
but then we'll need mo'! :) I can't get the image out of my
head, the black & white face, the pageboy haircut. Help
me, Lori. Help me get in touch with my Inner Mo. Tell him
his email greatly intrigued you. Get us Mo!
Lorina:
Yes, I think I must respond to Mo. He'll probably be Mo than
I could ever hope for.
At
the drive in
In the old man's Ford
Behind the bushes
Til I'm screamin' for Mo Mo MO!
Down the basement
Lock the cellar door,
And baby, talk dirty to Mo.
I
love him Mo than words can say. "Mo Mo Mo" by the
Andrea True Connection could be "our song." But
if he ever crosses me, I'll be a fool for his lovin' no Mo.
Ralph:
Sorry I have to add my bad pun here.... Write back to Mo to
find out his M.O.
So,
being an evil little creature, I did write back to Mo to find
out... well... mo! And he wrote back... a lot! (You really
don't have to read all of this... nothing exciting or earthshattering.)
In
all honesty, I was surprised that he was quite good-looking,
and even seemed kinda funny. But he never really gave me a
chance to respond before he started writing again.
Well,
since nothing else was going on at the time, I wrote back
to Mo and told him I liked his pic, and that I don't live
in Philly, but I'm considering moving either there or New
York. I was hoping he'd not write so much if I weren't going
to be a good tour guide.
Well,
at this point, I had lost any interest I might have had in
the Mo, so I didn't write back. Call me a freak, but I don't
care for doctors, lawyers, etc. Gimme a nice normal joe anyday.
But I digress... I had last written on July 29... It was only
4 days later.
Then,
the next day... in a new response to my personal ad...
And
I never heard from him no mo.
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